32.

examing that photo of teeth and i am realizing that teeth are fucking weird looking.

31.

today i thought about how lonely i might feel when i am older and the songs i listen to from now and years ago will bring memories that are long gone. just because they aren't the songs played regularly on the radio and the only constant is that they are my memories. the thought of my death gives me the creeps. i know i said i have faith in something, but i have no clue where i go when i die. i can't even convince myself of that.

30.

i get my bottom wisdom teeth out on Friday. i will be sitting at home with my chipmunk cheeks this wednesday. i read a book with an awful ending. i should have known. i've gotta start finding books to read that are more for my age.

29.

just purchased these at zappos.com. i've dressed more girly but my shoes remain boyish. i can't help myself. i also got some black flats but i love these more.

28.

also found an old type writer, two accordians, more polaroid cams, etc. i should look for antique shops around here. with all the old people, i'm sure to find a lot of good things.

27.

polaroid 250 land camera. my new baby.

26.

hey, your shoes were out of this world.

25.

not for you anymore.
for me.

24.

23.

22.

i finished watching paper heart tonight. my favorite thing about movies is i'm allowed to fall in love every single time with the characters, with soundtracks, with locations. i guess that's where i get my want for romance so much? i guess that's why it has consumed my thoughts a lot lately. i wish i were more creative. this afternoon i had a strong urge to paint a portrait and then i ignored it. i like faces. i couldnt tell you why. i just do. and i dont know why i painted them so much years ago. i dont know why i can't anymore. i hope the desire hits again.

21.

20.

i used to joke that every time i heard band of horses' Ben Bridwell sing i always imagined him in all white with flowy curls of hair and angelic girls floating by his side when he sang. such a weird imagination, i know.

19.

canwejustbesweetlysickromanticforeachother?moderateloveisboring.

18.

i'm excited for the summer and warmer weather.

17.

while waiting for her car to warm up, Tham and i talked about her life before now. i think it's amazing we met. who goes through refugee camp, illegal traveling, poverty, etc. and makes it out alive? i keep telling her she has to write a book. these stories are amazing and sometimes my eyes are filled with tears. things i could never imagine. on my drive home tonight i thought about how i always have this feeling of faith but i couldn't tell you where it comes from or what its name is or any of that. i just know things can be good and get better when they are not.